The East class of the medicine wheel is the end of the wheel and the beginning.
My east class coincided with the end of the Mayan calendar, a Great Death; I love serendipity. It was a great end, but it was also the beginning of my path of Shamanhood, a great rebirth; the wheel continues. The East is all about endings, and beginnings, death and rebirth, transcendence. All the work I had done was in preparation to that moment, the death of Me, the death of ‘I’, the rebirth of who I was becoming. It’s funny to look back at your journey, to who you were, I am not the same person I was when I started my healing journey. I know with great integrity that my internal world reflects the external world. The quality of my heart beat reflects in my own Be’ing-ness, it also ripples out into the world around me; as I change, the universe changes with me. All is, and Is not. On this part of the journey I became joined to the Kurakacullak, the Earth-keepers, the angels and ascended masters, becoming guardian of the earth, holder of sacred space. I also became aligned to the lineage of the Mosoq, the Star-keepers, those who mulch the wisdom and light of the stars and feed it back to their communities. I received my final kuya stones, my mesa became full, complete, and yet still only at the beginning. The east, place of the rising sun, the direction some of us will go when we are ready to leave this place. I spent some time in the upper worlds, it’s like the Bardo plains of Buddhism. I visited the stone world, a place of stone-cold darkness, a place before the coming of the light. I glimpsed this world when the only light from lightning flashed across the skies, lost souls walked this place. I found solace in the green lights of the plant kingdom, finally, the warmth of the sun shone down. The plants were so full of peace and light and gentleness, they caressed my skin. The land of the animals, all the creatures that ever were, are in the place, totems, spirit guides, familiars, animals long lost in the mists of time and creatures yet to be incarnated in the plane. The Ancestral realm is beautiful, our soul groups, our soul village, our loved ones are all here. The whales and orca live here too, who’s souls have individuated. Wise old beings. Further still we meet with Pachakuti, a being of great light. Higher still we fly to the crystal gardens, the rainbow fields, the cities of gold, here we meet the children of our future, and our celestial parents who birthed our souls into being. I got to experience what it’s like to sit with someone whilst they are dying, its beautiful. It’s a real genuine privilege to be at the threshold of life and death, to be the soul midwife as you oversea the birth of a soul back to source. I also got to experience what it’s like to leave this place, to say goodbye to those you love, and recapitulate your life, telling your story, and then fly home. I couldn’t go though, I didn’t experience the flight, many others did, I didn’t, I had unfinished business, things I hadn’t said, promises I couldn’t keep, things I hadn’t done (little did I know this very transition led me onto another healing journey straight after I got back from the east class, as I said, the journey continues…) It wasn’t the way I wanted to go. I know how I want to go now, and I know what I must do to enable me to do this, I learnt a very important lesson that day; while we are here in our bodies, say what you mean to say, finish unfinished business, keep your promises or un-promise them, do what you came here to do, tell your loved ones that you love them, forgive, accept, thank, otherwise you will not be able to fly home when the time comes, you will have a bumpy ride, and that is not something anyone would want. Death is such a taboo subject, whenever I have spoken about it to anyone, about the east work, I experience similar reaction; nervous fidgeting, strange screwed up faces, ‘deathly’ silence, subject change, awkwardness, yet if I mention a birth of a child everyone is animated, smiles and rosy cheeks all around, so many questions, so many squeals of joy. I know death brings up our most basic and primordial fear, and brings in its wake a tsunami of grief, but, death is the birth back to source, it Is just as beautiful, I promise you. The soul becomes like an innocent child again, a child of light, and is brought back into the arms of loved ones the same way it came into this world, full of love and joy and squeals of happiness. Yet we cannot talk about it, kids are hidden from it, the elderly or infirm sit silently while others creep around on egg shells ‘Don’t say the D word, Ssshhhh.’ I have seen great beauty and joy in death. Personally, I have seen death, I have walked with death, I have looked at death in the face. I was resuscitated twice, and yet lived, I even carried it for almost two decades, it wasn’t horrifying or traumatic, it just was, an experience, like any other. Honouring the deaths in our own lives is important too, the end of a relationship, the end of a career, the end of an experience, and all of them teach us how to die when the time comes for us to truly leave, with our eyes closed and our hearts open, flying home to be in the arms of our Mother once more... So now I take a deep breath and say a prayer to the new experiences I have shared, the lessons I have learnt, both the sweet ones and the bitter. Gratitude is the lesson I have learnt from this, it is one of the most important and beneficial modes to be in. Be gracious, Be grateful, Be Gratitude, Be love, be the rEVOLution, Be the EVOLution, All is Love anyway.
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At the foot of the mountain, Mount Ausangate, Apu Ausangate, I was greeted by a flock of gentle Hummingbirds.
Siwa kenti, the Royal Hummingbird, guided me to the North, up through the mountains of my soul. It was a solitary journey to take, one that would ultimately leave me with a choice, do I go back down the mountain, never realising my true identity, or Be-ing my authentic self, or do I step into who I am becoming, and carry on up the mountain path? My authentic self called to me, I continued. From this high place I could see my life through the eyes of the mythic, from this place I learnt to journey deep in the underworld to reclaim my graces and lost soul parts, missing pieces of myself I have longed for, for eons of time. I reclaimed my ‘elfin’ self, a luminous being of great strength and grace, I found my ‘young prince’ a being of dignity elegance and mature youthfulness. I received my ‘Hunter’ self, the man I am supposed to be, hunter, warrior, provider, father, the part of me that is energetic, yet still and graceful. With them came creatures of great power, gifts of wonder and inspiration for me to use. I journeyed higher still until I reached the outer atmosphere to the dark and stormy land of the stone people. Here I met with my Kuya, and received four more sacred stones. I ventured further until I reached the forest-that-never-was and the plant kingdom, further one the land of the animals and totem powers. I reached the land of our ancestors and spoke with the Whale and Orca, and just when I thought I could go no higher, I reached a place of infinity. That golden place where dreams are formed, a crystalline and etherical land of light and rainbows and love. Here I was greeted by my celestial mother and father, the archangels who birthed my soul into being. I spoke to our children, the children of our future, my future. All was quiet and peaceful when I landed at the fires edge, floating back down from The Dreaming. On top of that mountain, at the fires edge, I met an Altomesayoc. A keeper of the high plains, a keeper of secrets. In that solitude I was told a great and powerful secret, and I gave my word that I would keep this secret until the time was right to share it, and to keep it still. In sharing this secret with me, I was joined to the lineage of the Altomesayoc, the lineage of Wisdomkeepers. I stepped into my Shamanhood on this journey, sharing with others my wisdom. My head held high, I spoke my truth, holding sacred space for others, stepping outside of time into infinity, to bring back grace. My new kuya contain powerful yet illusive medicines; mastery of time, keeper of secrets, invisibility, and my new kuya, from the foothills of Machu Picchu, the lineage of the first people. As I went back down the mountain, my Mesa full and pulsing, hummingbirds fluttering and buzzing around, I unhooked myself from my place of origin in this life. At the edge of the mountain ridge, I hear a familiar cry, I look up at the sight of a circling eagle. I started my journey in the South with Great Serpent, Sachamama.
Through the vast swamps and great lakes of my soul I travelled, while learning to bask in the light of the sun. I remember learning how to bring down the light of the sun, our star, to illuminate all of life, it will always be one of my greatest gifts. I was taught how to remove hucha - heavy energies - in the luminous energy field, allowing us to grow, shedding our past the way a serpent sheds her skin, it is so important that we do this, and do it well, with ease, grace and the greatest of honour. In this process, my wounds were opened up, left bare and allowed to transform into three gifts; ecstatic laughter, non-judgment, accepting life as it is, and the responsibility of healing my own heart first, allowing life to simply be. I received new eyes that saw through the heart, removing the veil, the bullshit. The elements were woven around me, holding me, protecting me and all that I am. I called back my lost archetypes, ancient and powerful allies within my luminous energy field; a serpent, a jaguar, a hummingbird, a condor, and three Archangels of the Inca people; Huascar Inca, Quetzelcoatl and Pachacuti Inca. These archetypal energies/beings, now inform me and help me find balance and harmony. My Journey continued through the Wild West, a place where the mirror is placed directly in front of us. Here is where I faced my shadow parts, and extracted old wounds and lost, forgotten souls. As I said my goodbyes to Serpent, I was greeted by Otorangol, mother sister Jaguar. She came to me, over the rainbow bridge, and took me back with her to her lair. We went back through time, looking through the pool of remembrance, to bear witness to our past lives, enabling us to learn and to heal from them, rather than letting them inform us. I met with, and communed with three of my ancestors, who each gave me a gift; the permission to smile, sing and dance, contentment with what is, and peace in my garden. They taught me to shine, to keep shining and to sharing my gift to the world, the gift that is me. This time I travelled through the dark, wet, tangled forest of my mind, to meet with the Jaguar people who taught me about spirits and discarnate souls who inhabit the places they shouldn’t, inside us. I was taught how to send them home, back to source, back to wherever of whatever they came from. I learnt how to extract weapons of mass destruction from our luminous energy-fields. Crystalline energies that have festered within us over years, decades and even lifetimes. Removing these energies allows our energy to move freely once more, On the lowland plains, I was greeted by the tribe of the Pampamesayoc, those who built and are the caretakers and gatekeepers of All the sacred places of the world. They welcomed me as their brother, and tied me to their tribe. I am now Pampamesayoc, a keeper of the plains and sacred sites. Jaguar took us back through the chaotic tangled web of life unhooking me along the way, back over that rainbow bridge, to the foot of a beautiful mountain. I stepped into my destiny. I committed myself to the first step and said yes. I stepped out of the chaos just for a moment, out of the confusion and uncertainty, and through the soft veil of time into connection, love, infinity. Since I was a kid I wanted to ‘help heal the world of pain and suffering’ (my eyes roll now at my naivety.) Now I know that is not what is required of me, it’s not my place or my responsibility. My responsibility is to heal myself, to eek out all the painful hooks and let go of all the suffering I chose to hold on to. It is my responsibility to shine like the sun, without casting any shadows on the world, so I can walk hand in hand with others as they embark on their own journey of healing and transformation. You see I am a shaman of the Inca tradition, a medicine man, an energy worker, a conduit between heaven and earth. I started my journey in the south, place of the serpent, place of illumination, place of fire, light and combustion. To walk hand in hand with someone as you take your step from pain to bliss, is a tremendous experience, more than any other healing experience I have been through. Wounds; deep, insidious, unconscious, hidden. They are all drawn up and combusted within the fires of our bellies. I found it difficult at first to show my vulnerability, to show my dark frightened side, my soft belly, and to bring it up and present abandonment, hurt, self doubt, this work is only for the brave. Then within moments, see it transform into peace, acceptance, joy and laughter, miracles do happen. I had doubts about myself as a shaman, doubts that I could do it, doubts that I would be any good, fire combusted it. I stepped into the role of shaman and I realised that the 'thinking mind' has no place in that moment. When you cradle someone’s head in your hands, searching their soul for the vulnerability and pain, and giving it permission to surface, no mind is required, only presence, intent, love. And we wait for infinity to come. When the healing happens infinity takes over. Its like God lifts you up and says, 'I'll take over from here, Iv'e got this...' Infinity seeps into every part of your being, it seeps into the room and the person you are holding. They called it, its theirs (and all of ours.) The world stops, just for a moment, but it feels like forever. The body calls you back, a deep gasp of life and breath, like the first breath of a newborn. And there, glowing in the corners of the mouth, like a sun dappled forest floor, is a smile. The illumination process takes that which you no longer need, that which stops you saying yes to life, that causes pain, suffering, illness, and combusts it with light. The transformational power of fire - serpent - brings the wound to infinity, and when you come back, it starts to transform into love, peace, acceptance, laughter, enabling you to take a step towards new life. Hatun Amaru, great serpent, Sachamama. Thank you thank you, thank you for helping us shed our past the way you so beautifully shed your skin. Thank you for your coils of light you so gently and powerfully wrap around us. Thank you for helping us feel and sense the deep recesses of the soul to find that which no longer serves us. Thank you for helping us to grow and shine so beautifully as you do. Ho! Serpent WalkerCoils of light wrap around me, as I call serpent to me.
Soft scales gently and slowly enfold me, squeezing the spaces in my mind and soul, I see you lurking there, un-named shadow, Let me feel you, let me know you, remember you. Coils of light wrap around me, my breath quickens, my throat clamps up. No where left to hide, shadows run, pouring the ache all through me, shadow hiding in a Kuya Don’t be afraid, you will be my medicine! Coils of light wrap around me, and like its prey before the kill, I surrender with love and relief A little death touches me as the last of my breath is squeezed out I melt into infinity. Coils of light wrap around me, and I am floating on an ocean of light. My body calls me back, and I unravel, leaving me to bask in the warmth of the sun. Naked I lay like a heathen on the rocks, tears rolling down my cheek. I take a deep breath of joy and laughter bursts out! Hatun Amaru, Hatun Amaru, Sachamama. Many people ask me “What is a shaman?” or “What is Shamanism?”
(Deep breath) A Shaman is a type of priest, a healer, a psychiatrist, they were the first medicine people. They are a conduits between heaven and earth, walkers between the worlds, with one foot in the here and now, with all its beauty and pain, and one foot in the other-world, a world of potential, of grace, of spirit, of energy. A shaman sees the world through different eyes. We can only see a tiny fraction of the light available to us, all the colours we can see, all the lights and images we know is minuscule compared to what actually Is. 98% of our DNA (scientists claim,) is just ‘Junk.’ 99.9999999% of all solid matter is empty space. Which means that less than 1% of this world we live in is actually solid matter! Its heavy, present, full of joy, pleasure, pain and suffering. 99% of life here is energetic, space, spirit, light, a shaman works in this 99% world, affecting the 1% world we live in. Everything you see in front of you is a result of your thoughts and beliefs. Everything you can see, feel, touch, smell, taste, is a dream You created, therefore all of the events you see, the life circumstances your experience, and the people in your life who push your buttons are a part of your inner landscape. So if your landscape is full of scare-city, pain, suffering, grief, then that is what you will see, experience and know, but if you heal these wounds within, you will know the gifts inside them, instead you will experience abundance, pleasure, joy, happiness. During my training on the medicine wheel to become a shaman of the Inca tradition, I got to meet my ancestors, they were called through us to speak to us. I met an ancestor who lived in the early 1900's in New York, called Kenny. He was a fun loving kinda guy, an entrepreneur, dreamer, no one took him seriously, he turned to drink and gambling and eventually died of a heart attack. He said he felt like he was one of life’s losers. When we said goodbye he left me a gift “keep shining your gifts, your talents...and keep em laughing, people need to laugh, even if they think they don’t…” During my interview process, to start my healing journey, I said I felt like a loser. I felt I didn’t seem to be getting anywhere in life, each time I tried to do something I seemed to sabotage it. I started to cry tears of grief, sadness and anger, where did all this come from? I was tested to see if I had an entity within my luminous energy field, I tested positive. You see spirits can live within your luminous energy field, they feel just like your own energy so you wouldn’t know it was there, living through you; the entity was Kenny. We were connected because we both felt like losers, that was the hook, together we attracted situations in our life that made us feel like losers, opportunities would slip through our fingers, fear would grasp us. He was honoured, thanked, and sent on his way home. During the illumination process lots of hucha (Heavy energy; we don't use the term 'negative energy') came out, thick dark smog. My luminous energy field was opened up and crystallised energy that became stuck was extracted, this blocked my own energy flow, heavy lumps over my chest and throat were removed, the hook, the 'Loser' part of me was removed. Then light was poured all through me, filling up all the gaps that were left in its place, I felt peaceful, still, sacred, I reached infinity. My fight or flight pattern was switched off allowing me to rest in peace. When I came back into the room I felt silly, I laughed a little, I brought back joy and something else, 'Who cares?!' I laughed, 'Who cares if I’m a loser!?' I laughed more, I felt free, I felt love. I raised up my arms, 'So what?!” I felt free to be me. I still feel that if I fall or fail, I can laugh and get back up and carry on with joy in my heart. Shamanic healing is a transformational tool, a blessing, a gift, its like coming home, its like finding your family, its like falling in love. To experience it you must be ready to give all of yourself, to open up fully and embrace all of who you are, the good and the bad. Miracles do happen, it’s totally up to you if you want them to. So what is shamanism? Its miracle making. |
AuthorShamanism has been a passion and an inspiration for me for many years now. Archives
May 2021
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